Kyoko Weaver Ogita 1942-2023
From her husband, Richard: We held hands in a tender moment at her bedside. She knew her passing was near. As she’d always done, she remembered, even through all the pain, one very important last detail: “Please write a nice announcement for me?”
Her words so childlike, I forced back tears. “Of course. Remember, your notes are on my audio recorder.” She relaxed and gently squeezed my hand.
Kyoko’s roughly three-year warfare with cancer finally ceased in the hours before dawn on Wednesday, June 7, 2023. In those dark years I witnessed her unyielding courage in not giving ground to intense attacks from that debilitating disease, physical decline and final tsunami of pain overwhelming her hospice medications and her courage to live. She had the heart of a lion, yet a tender, enduring and strengthening love for her family and friends.
To her family and LW friends, Kyoko said, “My heart speaks to you in grateful thanks for your love and sweet gifts to me in my last months. Knowing each of you made my life rich and a joy. Your tender support lifted my hopes in those longest days and nights. We share wonderful memories. I remember you with much love.”
Her story: Panic gripped the Japanese civilian settlement. The Imperial Army was retreating from the Manchuria. Families had one hour before the last evacuation train departed. To be left behind meant imprisonment or capture. Kyoko’s mother furiously bundled clothing and food together, gathered her four children and fled to the train. Arriving at the port city hours later, it was learned all Japanese soldiers and male civilians, including Kyoko’s father, had already been evacuated by ships. The thousands of women and children would be evacuated in a second convoy. But those ships never returned. Kyoko and her family became immediate refugees.
Born in Manchuria to father Mikio Ogita and mother Kazue Ishiwata Ogita, Kyoko was the youngest of four children. As refugees they faced a harrowing struggle to survive while other refugees perished. Finally, one year later, U.S. and Allied Forces sent ships to evacuate the stranded civilians back to Japan. In Yokohama, life was hard. Too young for elementary school, Kyoko often spent hours alone standing outside the classroom watching her sisters learn their lessons. Kazue divorced Mikio, then raised four children, helped at times by their grandparents. Kazue’s employer forbade childcare at work but a neighbor took Kyoko in after school. She taught Kyoko the skills of knitting, sewing and crocheting skills, which Kyoko improved throughout her life. In high school, to save money, She tailored dresses and clothing for her mother and herself. After graduation, Kyoko attended a business school at night while working full time as a clerk at a shoe manufacturer. She earned a certificate as a Telex Operator. This combination of office and technology skills assured her of higher salaries. She also studied professional Japanese flower design and earned a license. Her designs often evoked praise and professional recognition. She saved money and arrived in Los Angeles in the late 1970s.
She worked three jobs as a telex operator, night shifts as a yarn factory employee and sewing apparel on weekends and lived in the YWCA. Her income increased, she found an apartment and bought a used car. A prestigious commodities trading firm hired her as a telex specialist. She left her other two jobs to attend evening adult vocational classes. She earned certificates in English proficiency and office computers.
Kyoko and her husband, Richard, met at a mutual friends party and dated a few months. One day her neighbor called Richard at work, letting him know that Kyoko was in an emergency room for surgery. She had no family there, so Richard left work and arrived at the hospital to find her asleep and looking weak. He sat at her bedside until she awoke hours later. Surprised but pleased, both of them sensed they had something special. The couple dated seriously after that, married along their life journey, over 41 years together.
Kyoko rose to become and assistant manager for purchasing at a Japanese aerospace company. Forced to retire after 20 years to care for her aging mother, she travelled back and forth to Japan. When, in mid-life, her husband Richard became totally blind, Kyoko assumed much of his care. Kyoko’s strengthening love and support motivated Richard to seek training and finally successful employment.
The couple moved to Leisure World in 2005. Kyoko was especially found of and a member of the Hula Club, where she also served as treasurer. She loved gardening, had a magical green thumb with plants and flowers (hydrangeas were her favorite) which prompted her to join the Garden Club. She enjoyed many Recreation Department excursions, especially baseball games to watch Shohei Ohtani, her favorite player.
Her joys included traveling to Hawaii, the Grand Canyon, and the Grand Tetons in Yellowstone. Her love of history found her traveling to many ancient Japanese historic sites, temples and even to a monastery in the mountains. There, she discovered ancient writings which traced the Ogita family origins. She loved dogs and would make instant friends with almost any dog on her walks around LW.
Her tenderness and advocacy for people with handicaps was daily practiced. She often stepped away from her hula dancers role to chat with patients watching the performance in different care facilities. She would reassure them, and even danced with them to help encourage them to be hopeful and show them love.
She loved sharing special foods and chats with her Japanese girlfriends and their laughter often filled her home with joy. Christmas season gave her great pleasure in decorating trees, her home, and even her husband. Singing her favorite carol, “Silent Night” would brighten her face as if it was illuminated from deep inside. Although not dedicated to a specific religion, she respected others and held a deep faith that there was a God, whom she might understand in her life journey.
Richard and her care giver were at Kyoko’s bedside as she gently eased in her sleep to eternity.
“I remember each of you with much love,” Kyoko said.
She is survived by her husband, Richard; cousins Yushi Ishiwata and Yoshiko Koda; and her nieces and nephews Mitsi, John Jr. III and Derek Byrum.
—Paid Obituary
